On the road,
hands free
By GINA DVORAK
PLEASE, yes, let's introduce another gadget to the driver's seat. That will improve concentration on the road, no doubt.
As someone who's survived a rollover accident — thanks to my seat belt, which I was wearing mostly because it was required by law — I generally appreciate rules put in place for safety reasons.
But this hands-free cell phone requirement has me spouting off about it every time I think about jamming some uncomfortable plastic nub into my ear.
Mind you, I'm not the sort who yammers away my 450 minutes of peak air time on a regular basis, so it's not like this law is impacting my life on a daily basis. In general, during the day, I've got better stuff to do.
Even in my car, I have better stuff to do. For instance, satellite radio!!! (It's like "cable" for my stereo!!) My car's CD player also lets me set up a playlist from the six CDs I have in the changer, which is fun, too.
But I never had a problem tuning out whoever I was talking to in favor of paying attention to the traffic around me, and I resent the fact that someone else thinks it would be less distracting to put me into this scenario: Lane 2, mile 4: "Hey there, hold on a sec... I can't hear you.
My earpiece is falling out."
Lane 2, mile 4 1/2: "OK. That's better.
... What? ... Hold on. I need to adjust the volume.
"I must have been talking to someone before whose cheap Bluetooth made his voice so loud and distorted I felt like I was Peppermint Patty talking to my teacher... ‘Wah wuh, wha wahwuh wah, wah, wah.' Except those ‘Charlie Brown' kids always seemed to be able to understand what the adults were actually saying."
Lane 2 1/2, mile 5: *HONK HONK!!* "WHOA! Driving. Yes. Me. ...
Yikes, OK, there. That's better. Anyway, you were saying..."
Lane 2, mile 9: "Gah! This stupid cord keeps strangling me. I really need to find my Bluetooth. I can't believe I lost the stupid thing three weeks after I bought it."
Lane 3, mile 12: "You know what? I can't talk to you on this stupid thing anymore. This dumb earpiece is burning a hole into my skull, and I can't concentrate. How about I just text you?" Yes, that's right. You can still text message in the car — for now. Likely it will be the very next thing to go.
But I'm thinking that pressing one button and holding something to your ear for a few minutes is probably a lot safer than the above scenario.
Noteworthy exceptions to the law (according to the DMV's web site):
"Operators of an authorized emergency vehicle during the course of employment are exempt, as are those motorists operating a vehicle on private property."
(So, basically, the hands-free rule won't apply if you're weaving in and out of traffic and running red lights as long as your vehicle is properly equipped with sirens and light bars, or if you do, in fact, truly own the road.)
"The law does provide an exception for those operating a commercial motor truck or truck tractor (excluding pickups), implements of husbandry, farm vehicle or tow truck, to use a two- way radio operated by a ‘push-to-talk' feature."
(In other words, it's OK to drive a fully loaded MACK truck one-handed in favor of keeping in touch with your dispatcher. Fantastic.)
You can, also, utilize the speaker- phone function, if your phone is equipped with such an option (and you're over 18, of course). I was pretty excited to find out mine did until I tried using it on the freeway.
My car doesn't have a lot of road noise, but good luck trying to hear your callers while passing a semi.
Granted, the consequences of breaking the hands-free cell phone law are relatively minimal — the first offense will cost you $20, the rest will cost you $50-60 — considering that it's almost $400 if you're caught violating the rules of the precious Diamond Lane or running a red light near the mall.
But if you break this law and have an accident with your cell phone at your ear, you'd better have a good lawyer on speed-dial, preferably voice-activated.
